BusyBeeBlogger had quite SoyJoy the treat last week, when I was able to interview Destin Pfaff of the Millionaire Matchmaker.
We talked about what not to do on a date, movies, his son Sin Halo with wife Rachel,and of course his boss Patti Stanger. You won’t believe what bonded them together.
Check it out!!! And a big “THANK YOU!” to Soy Joy and Destin Pfaff!
* Congratulations on the wedding to Rachel (Federoff)! Will we be seeing any of the wedding on Millionaire Matchmaker this year?
You will NOT be seeing any of the actual wedding but there is matter of fact, even today, some clips of the wedding prep. A very cute clip of our son (Sin Halo).
How old is he?
He’s 2 and a quarter. He’s had this great developmental leap. He’s gone for “momma, baba, dada” to full paragraphs and sentences. Analyzing things and understanding consequences of his actions. It’s pretty spectacular to see.
I can’t even imagine what that’s like as a parent to see
It’s the most amazing thing in the world. I never realized how much you can love another creature. I love my mother, I love my wife and I love my friends but that little boy… I cannot. The cannibal that lives down in our DNA way deep inside of us, comes up because you just want to eat them alive. I never realized how much I just want to gnaw on my son. Just watching him, though, like the negative part of it, you have this living clock. He’s just there, growing so fast and you realize, you’re getting old fast. I used to love to go out in Hollywood and do this or do that and now it’s 8 o’clock and it’s like, ok what’s on TV before I go to sleep at 10.
I’m sure it’s all worth it
Well, thanks, he’s my little man.
* How long have you been working with Patti?
I’ve been with Patti about 7 years?
Were you there when she first started the Millionaire’s Club?
No. Patti started MC about 12 years ago. I came in about her 5th year. She had already been in business well before I came along.
How did you guys hook up? I mean, not you and Patti HOOKUP but how did you start working together?
*laughs* Great now THAT gossip’s getting out. *laughs*
I am a screen writer, what would happen is I would write screen plays and I would be lucky enough to option them off and make some money. Then, sometimes in the wonderful world of Hollywood, you don’t sell anything. So in between screen writing jobs I would go and I would fix up small businesses. I would get them a little bit more organized, more streamlined, make them a little bit more profitable.
And, actually, I made some money from a screenplay, so I had taken a job at a video store because I always wanted to. I’m a big movie guy. And it was neat… for like, a second. Then it wasn’t neat that much, because I had to deal with the public and that was sort of weird for me.
So, Patti called me up. I had posted a resume online she found my resume and she called me two minutes after I posted it. I went and met with her, and you know, she was a little high energy and I was on the little alternative different side. We clicked right away, because she’s also a writer. People don’t realize it but she’s an amazing writer. So we had a very similar background, and we just talking about TV shows, and she was in talks to get her television show at the time, so we just kind of clicked.
So what was supposed to happen was to have me sort of helping her out, doing a little bit of work as well as organizing and streamling and getting her to the next circle profit-wise… What was just supposed to be a couple months has now turned into years and years and years and years. And after I was there for a while, she started teaching me the art of matchmaking, which I didn’t want to do at all. Kicking and screaming she forced me to learn it, and I found out I had a knack for it, and the rest is history.
* Watching so many people struggle to find love, has that impacted your relationship with (your wife) Rachel?
You know, I would like to say it HAS, but in all honesty it hasn’t. We’re kind of “Doctors of love”. So when a doctor goes in to surgery he has to put all of his personal things aside. He just has to go in there, focus all of his attention on that patient, do what needs to be done to remedy it and make that patient fixed and healthy. And as soon as he’s away from the patient, it’s back to reality for him. He has to completely compartmentalize.
In our line of work it’s very similar in very different ways. A lot of our work is in emotion and in love coaching and life coaching and getting people where they need to be in order to be in the right relationship. We can’t control chemistry, but we can control and encourage them to do the right thing so that love will find them. We help them in that search.
With Rachel and I, we have to kind of do our own thing our own way. Because there is no just… I believe that as long as you know the rules and you understand the rules you can break the rules a little bit.
Ok kind of like being a musician where you have to learn the basic scales and as soon as you know that you can go ahead an improvise as much as you want?
You go it.
+ Now you’re sharing dating advice for FREE by working with Soyjoy. How did that pairing happen?
Well, Soy Joy contacted me about their product, and this plan that they have for their “Real Take On” campaign, and coincidentally I was at some convention thing doing an autograph signing session, and I stumbled across their product. It was the first time I had it. So I it even before they contacted me and it was really really good. I completely enjoyed it, and as soon as they asked me about it and they told me how they were going about getting the word out on the Soy Joy bars, I was sold. I was in.
It’s a little bit different from what I was used to flavor-wise and taste-wise. In all honesty it’s yummy and better for you than half the crap that’s out there with candy bars and everything else.
Yeah, it’s not your typical “health food bar” that I can’t stand.
Yeah. It’s not. And I have cholesterol issues sometimes and you know, eating Soy Joy bars kind of helps that out a little so they say… so.
* Some of the tips that you give in the video seem obvious. Such as be on time and don’t get drunk. Does it surprise you that people need these kind of reminders?
I hate to say it, and I’m going to say it. Most people are socially stupid. They are so unaware of themselves. Especially in big metro areas like L.A. and New York and in Florida. They just take everything for granted.
There tends to be this very cavalier attitude of “Hey I’m ten minutes late, but everybody’s ten minutes late. What’s it matter?” Well, it does matter. It’s disrespectful.
A lot of times when you’re out, and on a first date, there’s a little bit of nervousness, so you’re having a drink. And the conversation is going, you’re enjoying it, so you have another drink and all of a sudden it’s 3, 4, 5 down the line because it just tastes so good and you want something to do with your hands while you’re talking. That’s when everything goes from going great to nose diving. A lot of people just don’t know how to control their alcohol and it’s a big mistake on a date.
I was just watching your video thinking there are so many people I could send this to. Just for the basics of be on time, don’t be drunk, and look presentable!
Yes, look presentable. I’ve seen so many guys, and our millionaire guys are just as guilty as everyone else, show up for a date in tennis shoes, shorts and a T-shirt. You just don’t do that!! Do you want the girl to show up looking schlumpy? What you want, give.
It’s so sad, it’s common sense. And people don’t have common sense. They’re lazy.
I think that your show, though, is actually helping a lot of people figure out some of the basics of what to, and not to do on a date
I am just getting frustrated that I feel I should be chaperoning all of our dates. It’s just ridiculous.
+ How much convincing did it take to get you into that dress?
*laughs* OH THE DRESS, that took a little bit of convincing for me to do. But, I liked the color, and it complimented my body type. I was a little disappointed they didn’t have heels or pumps in my size but you know, you kind of go with it.
You accessorized it pretty well. We were pretty impressed with how you pulled it off.
*laughing* If you’re not comfortable in your own skin and you’re not secure in yourself you should not be doing anything I or we do. Have you seen my hair? It’s ridiculous.
* You aren’t just a pretty face in front of the camera, you are also a producer director and writer, doing the movie Sushi Girl earlier this year. Do you have anything in the works at the moment?
We just wrapped up our movie Sushi Girl which is in the final stages of production now. It stars Mark Hammel and Tony Todd and Danny Trejo and a bunch of other amazing actors. It’s an absolutely amazing film. We’ve got a huge amount of buzz. Thank G-d and knock on wood.
We’ve just announced in the trades a couple weeks ago a movie that I’m producing called Catalytic. To be directed by the veteran award winning actor Tony Todd who was in The Rock and Candyman. It’s going to be an amazing film that will be out next year. And then we have a whole slate of movies we will be announcing here in the next few months including one that I will be directing. A very very scary ghost story… with a love twist.
So I’m still holding on to the love thing.