Honey Bee

Sweetheart – Olivia De Berardinis

Ah St. Valentine’s Day… It brings us such warm and fuzzy feelings, and of course, love songs. But what about those songs that you may THINK are wonderful torches, but are really just WRONG all over.

I have your top 10… and here we go!

10. Extreme More Than Words. In the 90s Extreme seemed to be able to pull the wool over the public’s eyes with this “heartfelt ballad” about love, and tenderness. Little did we know that it was just a song about sex. Yup, in an interview the boys explained that they had written the song as an enough with the talk…let’s just do it song. I wonder what all those people who had it at their weddings think about it now?

9. Bryan Adams Run To you Ah the song that says “It’s so damn easy making love to you”. I never paid attention to the words, ever. But when I did, I lost all my love for Bryan and his professions of “staying all night”.

8. Frank Sinatra Strangers In The Night Old Blue Eyes was said to have DESPISED this song, but it’s been used in movies, dance floors and living rooms for wooing for decades! But really, it’s just about a one night stand.

7. The Jackson 5 I Want You Back Ok let’s just start with the fact this is a CHILD singing about how he treating his woman wrong. Then now that she’s happy with someone else, he wants her back. Not just HAPPY but ENGAGED to someone else. He just wants her back because she’s happier WITHOUT him??? Girl run as fast as you can!

6. Brad Paisley Ticks I love me some Brad Paisley, but this, was just wrong. Sure, check out my jeans, and my butterfly tattoo. Tell me how you wish you were my beer bottle up on my lips. But for Gawd’s sake, saying you want to check me for ticks? That just takes the air out now doesn’t it?

5. Dramarama Anything Anything I’ve had boyfriends send me this song as a profession of love, and at first listen, this song is just PERFECT! The idea of a guy doing ANYTHING for you is what some girls DREAM of… but talking about how you got wasted and my dad got in a fist fight? That isn’t very romantic now is it?

4. RadioHead Creep When you’re in college and your new man tells you that you’re perfect, and so F*cking Special, you think it’s cute and endearing. But when he starts saying that he wants to have control and he’s a creep BELIEVE HIM!!! He has issues way beyond thinking you’re wonderful… run run Run RUN RUNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!

Rod Stewart:Tonight’s the night(Gonna be
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3. Rod Stewart Tonight’s The Night Much like Sinatra’s Strangers In The Night, it sounds so sweet and loving, but face it, it’s a one night stand. But with lines like Spread your wings, and let me come inside, Rod lacked the finesse of Frank.

2. Dean Martin Baby it’s Cold Outside Ah isn’t that sweet, Dean just wants me to be safe and warm… Let me ply with you liquor until you have to stay the night.

1. The Police Every Breath You Take No shocker here. How a song about stalking and possession became THE profession of love, even Sting doesn’t know. It’s still used at weddings, and mixed tapesplaylists of new lovers.

Honorable mentions

Nine Inch Nails – Closer It’s the You get me closer to Gawd that makes it somewhat endearing. But it’s the I wanna F*ck you like an animal that shows the true intent. Still hot though.

Ringo Starr – You’re 16. Um… that’s a felony

Portishead – Sour Times Is this a song about love or assassinating your lover?

Bad Romance – Lady Gaga She just comes out and says it’s going to be bad. Even though she accepts you unconditionally.

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